I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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