we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
Do vagina's smell?
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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