We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Randomize