i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize