Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
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