I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
It was a blind-side dick pic.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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