6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize