i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Randomize