Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
