First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
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