So drunk, too bad you don't want this
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Randomize
