I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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