i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
It's official drugs can't kill me
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
