there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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