Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
