Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
the day after is always just damage control
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
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