ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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