If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
Randomize