she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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