I need help removing her.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
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