I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
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