Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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