i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
Randomize
