he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
