i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
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