yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
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