I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Randomize
