all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
How external is "for external use only"?
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Randomize