can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
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