I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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