it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
if i can run in heels then i can drive
She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
Randomize
