and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
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