Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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