I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
Sext me about skeletons
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
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