redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Randomize
