god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
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