just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
