Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize