Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
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