Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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