hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
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