You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Randomize
