So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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