She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
Randomize
