She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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