Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Randomize