Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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