Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Randomize