He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize