i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
