Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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