There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize
