the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
They are going to name an STD after you.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Randomize
